Going for the 'Old'

Anyone who made it through the third grade knows that brains count for nothing if you don't read the directions before the completing an assignment.

Apparently, most of the Season 5 designers were asleep during this crucial grade-school lesson. In nearly every design challenge so far, at least a third have created looks that simply miss the directives of the given challenge. Either they aren't listening or they just don't care.

No matter what the reason, I'm underwhelmed with almost all of these people. The whole point of Project Runway is to challenge the contestants by forcing them to design outside their comfort zone. If the designers refuse to leave their respective niches, the competition is a wash.

The cluelessness continued this week as the designers were asked to create a look for the American team to wear during the opening ceremony of the Olympics. Tim took the contestants to the Olympic museum at New York's Armory Track and Field Training Center for inspiration.

Most of the group immediately latched on to photos of Olympic outfits from the 1940s and 50s and completely let go of the essence of the challenge -- creating a modern design that athletes could wear while representing America to the world. Instead they created looks that mostly seemed to represent wardrobe from old Doris Day movies.

Daniel was among the worst offenders. He claimed to have never watched the Olympics and I almost buy that. But the footage shown on TV indicates that the museum included photos from recent Olympics. Daniel must have seen these photos and chosen to ignore them.

The judges said his dress was perfect for an Olympic drinking competition. I think it looks like the dresses Lois Lane wears in old Superman comics:


Lucky for Daniel, Jennifer's dress was both unpractical for the Olympics and completely boring:


In her goodbye interview, Jennifer claimed that her "Surrealism" design aesthetic brought something different to the show. Too bad those comments were the only thing even close to surreal that Jennifer did during her tenure.

Joe, Korto and Terri came to the runway with an automatic leg up on the competition since they actually created the type of look the challenge required.

Korto won:

Her design was cute, but those linen pants would have been crazy wrinkled by the time the hours-long Opening Ceremony was over.

I would have given the win to perennial bridesmaid Terri. Her look was sophisticated and sporty. In addition, there were several different layers so the athletes could have bundled up or stripped down according to the weather conditions.

When are the judges going to reward Terri? She is the season's single design bright spot:

I can't believe I'm saying this, but Stell-vira is another of the season's (few) bright spots. Designwise, she is way out of her league and I want her kicked off as soon as possible. But her utter lack of tact and self-awareness cracks me up.

Here are some of the winning Stell-vira quotes this week:

On her decision to create an all-black Olympic ensemble:
"There's a lot of bikers in this country who watch the Olympics."
and
"It represents the country in a bad-ass way."

On her desire to win a challenge:
"Whoever gets immunity is really important because you get a chance to fuck up and not get fired for it."

Some of other quotes of the week:

Tim after learning that Blayne doesn't know who the Beatles are:
"Oh God, youth!"

Another exchange about Stell-vira's black design:
Jerrel: "So Stella, why are you using all black?"
Blayne: "Because we're going through a depression."